By Viridian
Reviews
Asad posted a comment on Wednesday 3rd May 2006 2:48am
Ooooh! Evil cliffy!
Good work as Harry begins to realize how relationships might change in this alternative world.
Dunno why, but this chapter seemed very short to me.
Eagerly awaiting the next chapter!
Katherine posted a comment on Wednesday 3rd May 2006 12:45am
I loved Arthur’s thoughts in the beginning of this chapter. The idea of if someone had told me a year ago..... made me laugh. Is Ginny acting like she is cause she wants to go with Harry to the Valentine's dance? Or for some totally other reason? I too think that Harry needs to give his friends a little credit. I very much doubt his friends are going to abandon him once they find out what Harry's been keeping from them. Will Draco try to get the diary back? Will he get it back? Will he get any info out of Harry? Hope to find out what will happen soon. Will Harry be able to save Dobby this year? Or can Harry manipulate Dumbledore into summoning Mr. Malfoy to Hogwarts. And this time around can Harry take Dobby into his employ? And maybe Winky later on before she falls into depression.
MarinePotterfan posted a comment on Tuesday 2nd May 2006 11:42pm
Ahhh! a cliffy, now I need an update. What a story. I love the whole Harry/Ginny conflict that Harry has. He wants to be with her but is holding back because he wants her to like him for him and not because of what he knows about the future. I think that his friends are ready to here the whole thing and I can't wait for the chapter that it is in. I wonder who attacked him. He knows the voice, but who was it. And I think that Draco came back also but not to his body like Harry did. It will be great to see how you have this all come out in future chapters.
Keep up the great writing.
MPF
Zarz posted a comment on Tuesday 2nd May 2006 10:19am
I'm so glad you had Harry remove the diary from Ginny's cauldron! That may seem a silly thing to say, but I read one Harry goes back to the past where he dicided that - even knowing all the pain and anguish it would cause Ginny and the rest of the school - he would let her be possessed by the diary so that she would "mature" and so forth like she did in the original time line! While I certainly can't fault Harry for wanting a more mature Ginny, the fact that he would willingly manipulate her and her life, and let that happen to her just made my skin crawl. I'm so glad that you had Harry just remove the diary and be done with it. Not only does that seem far, far more in character, but it also shows that as an author, you're willing to deal with the changes Harry would logically make to the timeline, and sort through what that would do. Several times you have Harry feeling guilty about how he's manipulated his friends, but while I think he would continue to feel guilty about it, I think he's doing the right thing, the only thing he could do. I also like your explanations about the occlumency. While I am looking forward with baited breath to the rest of the gang having decent shields and him telling them everything, most Harry back in time stories either have him tell everyone everything to begin with, or not tell anyone anything for reasons that don't make any sense, other than that he's afraid. You've come up with a brilliant, sensible plan to circumvent that and have everything logical, well-thought out, and what I imagine canon would be like if it happened this way. Good job!
Zarz posted a comment on Tuesday 2nd May 2006 10:04am
I love this story! I am inclined to think that Harry's friends will all forgive him when they find out what is going on, but I still can't wait to see that scene, however it turns out. Keep up the good work - I can't wait to see another update of this! (Who did attack him, and will he be able to get out of it before much damage is done? At least, for Harry, I'm sure he'd far prefer to be kidnapped, even tortured, himself, then there to be the possibility that that was happening / had happened to one of his friends.) I'm glad that Professor McGonagall seems to be understanding of the DA. That will likely help a lot. Also, it's interesting that Harry still broke a bone in this timeline, but things had already changed so much that Lockheart de-boning him never even came up. I think that's one of the best indications of how things have changed for the better. You are a really talented author, and if your novels are anywhere near as good as NFP, I suspect they'll be incredible loved!
Chris Steadman posted a comment on Monday 1st May 2006 8:27am
While I like your sotry, I have a bit of a problem with your characterizations.
You seem to be confusing a bunch of 11 and 12 year-old children with much older teenage adolescents.
While writing your story in such a way as to make them more mature is fine, it's quite another thing to ascribe things like romantic affection, deep forethought, and calm rationale to kids this age.
If it were just Harry, that would work. It fits this verion of his character. But applying these kinds of too-mature attributes to the other characters the way you do... It just doesn't jive. It gets kinda creepy, too.
You make them seem *too* adult, far beyond what's believable for a story such as yours.
Viridian replied:
Here's a couple of things to keep in mind:
First, Wizarding culture seems to hold a fairly medieval attitude toward the aging process. Children are given access to deadly weapons at age 11 (wands). It also seems that they mature a bit faster than usual. James and Lily were fairly well off (James' parents were wealthy, and the Evans' seemed to be at least Middle class), which usually mitigates against marrying at a young age. Yet, they married immediately after graduating, at age 17, and no one seems to think this is unusual. (And no, they didn't 'have to'. Harry was born more than 9 months later.) These facts suggest that children in the English Wizarding World seem to be expected to mature a bit sooner than in western Muggle culture. They also deal with some heavy social issues for a bunch of young teenagers (by our standards).
Secondly, Harry is having a more profound effect on his peers than he realizes. (He's a little surprised when Ron doesn't act like a prat.) When you integrate a group of mixed-age children, one of two things typically happens. The older children regress to the behavioral standards of the younger cohort, or they hold firm and, in effect, raise the bar of acceptable behavior for their peers. This really works (I went to grad school in developmental psychology) and is the theoretical basis for Mainstreaming special education classes.
Notice that Ron and company didn't change much at first, but the more they hung around Harry, the more it began to affect them.
One of the aims of Arthur's retrospective was to underline the changes in Ron. He acts differently than in canon because "he doesn't want to let Harry down". Harry needs him more as a friend, confidant, and protector this time around, not someone to skive off doing homework with. Add to that Harry being a lot more open about the less than stellar aspects of his life, and you get a Weasley acting very mature.
Neville was raised by his aunt, with no children his own age around. Once he gets over his hesitancy and confidence issues, he's going to act like how Augusta raised him to be. Harry's demeanor just reinforces that.
Hermione is less bossy because no one is challenging her regarding the importance of their school work. (Harry regards it as just one more means of preparation, after all.) She also has a wider circle of friends, which is probably helping her confidence issues. Her issues, plus Ron's immaturity, were the barriers that set them to bickering instead of getting along. Not that Harry isn't above a little subtle influencing (like with the thank you gift), paying a debt to their future counterparts who regretted all the time they waster fighting.
You've watched Ginny being built up by Harry's letters and emotional support and overall confidence-boosting. In canon, she feared never being taken seriously by anyone (that's according to Riddle in CoS)... in NFP, the boy she idolized just a little bit from the stories respects her, is friendly towards her, and treats her almost like an adult. What's not to like about that? And so she embraces that role and runs with it. Once she started, she also began getting positive feedback from her family as well, which will only reinforce it.
As for Luna... who knows why the hell she does anything anyway! =)
Terry Swain posted a comment on Sunday 30th April 2006 11:21am
gREAT CHAPTER. :)
Charles Slone posted a comment on Sunday 30th April 2006 9:58am
intresting story, can't wait to see where this goes now
dee posted a comment on Sunday 30th April 2006 7:00am
great chapter! i hope u update more often than u did before...
Wolf550e posted a comment on Sunday 30th April 2006 4:13am
Ruddy awesome! Keep writing!
Robit the Hobbit posted a comment on Saturday 29th April 2006 9:19pm
I have a suspicion that you are not too keen on the ferret either.
Another good chapter.
Robit the Hobbit posted a comment on Saturday 29th April 2006 7:58pm
Is anyone a Lockhart fan?
Excellent story
Life's a Dance posted a comment on Saturday 29th April 2006 10:48am
I HATE CLIFFIES!!! You are an evil, evil, EVIL author to leave it like that...That said, please update soon! The uncertainty is killing me!
Kim Patterson posted a comment on Saturday 29th April 2006 8:01am
A cliffie? Those are so hard to take. It was great to read your latest chapter and I'm greatly looking forward to the next...and hoping it won't be too far away.
:-) Thanks
Jack-A-Roe posted a comment on Saturday 29th April 2006 12:48am
Iloved Arthur's reflection, especially the part if anyone had asked him a year ago...
I think Harry is making too big a deal with his feelings for Ginny. Each day she is more different than the one he knew. If he likes this new person and she likes him, then there is no problem. If not, then he was at least true to his word to help her out and make her early years better than they were before.
Does anyone in the school find it odd that a second year muggle raised student can out duel older students? Shouldn't that raise the eyebrows of some of the professors?
When Harry got through the detention with Snape with no problems, he should have been wondering what was going on. Constant Vigilence!
Looking forward to the next chapter.
Viridian replied:
"I think Harry is making too big a deal with his feelings for Ginny. " Neurotic people do that.
"Does anyone in the school find it odd that a second year muggle raised student can out duel older students?" Not if it's the Boy Who LIved, defeater of Voldemort!
"Shouldn't that raise the eyebrows of some of the professors?" - Not when you consider the number of books he seems to be reading, the marks he and his friends get, and the extra practice they do every morning before breakfast.
"Constant Vigilence!" True, but unless you are Mad-Eye himself, you can only look in one direction at once...
Kail Ceannai posted a comment on Friday 28th April 2006 5:44pm
I had to reread half your story to even remember which one it was and get the details straight from other Harry-transfers-memories-back-in-time stories. Once I got everything straight, I enjoyed your chapter very much despite the unfair cliff hanger.
Thanks for the update!
demonsx posted a comment on Friday 28th April 2006 4:38pm
Awesome update, I love this story.
ridmania posted a comment on Friday 28th April 2006 4:16pm
awesome but very mean of you im ssooo upset harry is awesmoe if its snape or malyfoy you have to get harry to fucking kick their ass big time
Meteoricshipyards posted a comment on Friday 28th April 2006 2:58pm
Evil! Evil! Evil Cliffie! No cookie for you!
That's pretty good.
I liked that he was able to bring McGonnagal over to his thinking. Glad the others are almost ready to know the awful truth. Happy that Molly is helping heal up Sirius. And mad that I'm probably going to wait another month or so before we find out who stunned Harry and what happens to him.
Thanks for writing. Good story!
Tom A.
Graup posted a comment on Wednesday 3rd May 2006 5:34am