By Viridian
Reviews
Quizer posted a comment on Thursday 16th March 2006 11:55pm
> "If there is an inquiry of any sort, I will
> deal with it, and make whoever raised it
> sorry to have done so."
Hmm... I wonder, will there be one in future chapters? Might be interesting to see her dress down Kakashi...
> Naruto was frustrated that he couldn’t build
> up calluses and scar tissue on his knuckles
> like Lee could.
Hmm... Looks like Naruto's regenerative capabilities come in distinctly unhandy here. I never thought that having that sort of ability could have anything but advantages (disregarding torture settings).
BTW, what does that 'ano' word mean which Hinata frequently uses? ^_^
And the -teme 'honorific' that Naruto uses for Sasuke? (the general tone makes it quite obvious it is anything but...)
You know, if Hinata used her Jyuuken on Naruto, he'd discover his 'resistance' to it earlier, before his fight with Neji. Or doesn't he know how to channel the Kyuubi's chakra yet? Is any of that coming up? (You can use your usual vague hints to answer if there might be, it makes waiting for it more fun!)
Hope you'll update soon!
Quizer
Viridian replied:
1. She'd probably enjoy it as well.
2. Naruto of course doesn't realize that the whole point of calluses is to prevent the kind of 'wear and tear' damage that his body repairs so quickly it barely registers. He just thinks they look cool. *rolls eyes*
3. It's sort of the equivalent of "Um" or "Excuse me,"
4. The best translation I have seen is "-bastard" so it's "Sasuke-Bastard" to you, buddy! =)
5. Yes. (Was that vague enough?)
I owe the HP fans a new chapter of NFP first, so...
ShadeHawk posted a comment on Saturday 11th March 2006 12:35pm
I like this fanfic very much, even if I haven't watched the original manga (well, I haven't watched that much manga at all). Well done training angle, well done character development and a bit of romance in the air, very well done mission/fight scenes.
Keep up the good work. May writing be always joy to you.
--
ShadeHawk
Alcatras posted a comment on Thursday 9th March 2006 3:43pm
I like your story. please continue it.
It is the only sotry i have ever read where Naruto is on team 8.
If you know more of this kind could you tell me where to find them?
Giringiro posted a comment on Thursday 9th March 2006 10:17am
I'm a faithful reader of the Naruto manga (no access to the anime so far). And I must say, I like your Team 8 more than the original Team 7. With Kakashi at the helm and the utterly boring romantic triangle and predictable rivalry/bickering dynamic, the one thing Team 7 is good for, is consistent comic relief... But not much else.
It's uncanny how you're showcasing all my favourite characters! Besides Naruto, there's Hinata and Shino (along with Iruka and Shikamaru), it's a real pity they're rarely featured in the manga. You did a great job illustrating the Naruto/Hinata partnership, and how both can benefit from the other's abilities and personality.
I wonder, how long are you planning to follow the original plot? Chuunin exam, Hokage death, Sennin fight, pursuit after Sasuke, the three-years-later power-up? Will you mirror the entire Naruto series or do you have a different ending in mind?
Well I'm enjoying this fic. Thanks and please keep writing!
Zero Blitz posted a comment on Thursday 9th March 2006 8:40am
Hey, this is the first Naruto fanfic I've read (though, I'm gunna start looking for some now) and it's really good so far. I like the idea for Naruto's team in this fic, but why does Sasuke hate Naruto in this? In the manga, he just seems to see him as another challenge who's lead a similar life but in the opposite direction (as shown in chapter/episode 3, where Sakura says that Naruto's spoiled because he doesn't have parents or rules but Sasuke tells her that the feeling of loneliness far outweighs the feeling of being yelled at). Is he gunna be Naruto's rival all throughout the fic?
I haven't paid much attention to Hinata in the manga, but her and Sakura have been the only ones I'd thought would work, and since the manga is Naruto/Sakura why not do Hinata? I think she'd make a really good character once she gains a little more confidence (well, she's a good character now..).
I don't know you chose Shino (in the long run), but I hope he turns out well and are you gunna show us any of Kurenai's special techniques any time soon?
I don't really know what to say at the moment because there aren't any noticable mistakes and the story flows really well, I just hope you don't take too long with the Naruto/Hinata stuff (like you're doing with H/G in NotFP, although with good reason) and although you say this is gunna be your secondary story to NotFP, I think this is just as good, so if you have ideas for both, don't just do NotFP, do them both (just at a slower rate).
Keep up the good work.
WingsofLead posted a comment on Thursday 9th March 2006 6:11am
Gets more interesting as things go on. Team 7 goes on their C-rank mission without Naruto, leaving me to wonder how things have gone for them without Kyuubi's extra power against Haku. Though admittedly, the Demon brothers and their chain wouldn't have come as much of a suprise to the genins with Kiba on their team. It wouldn't suprise me if they came back with a failure to protect the bridge builder this time though.
Naruto is advancing in his maturity to a great degree, I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
Quizer posted a comment on Thursday 9th March 2006 3:12am
> She’d have to find an excuse to talk to the
> man at some point. Naruto might just be a
> regular customer to the man, but it wouldn’t
> do to make assumptions.
I don't understand at all what she's on about here. What ulterior motive could the guy possibly have for being friendly to Naruto and his friends?
If we are going to find out later, don't spoil what will happen yet.
Quizer
Quizer posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 10:55pm
I also wonder what Hinata's father will make of her defeating the infiltrator in battle. Sure, Naruto roughed him up first, and Shino's bugs kept him from using ninjutsu, but he doesn't need to know that, does he? ;)
Still, it's probably too much to hope he'll cut her some slack now. If Hinata is expecting a break in this regard, she's in for a painful let-down. Maybe she'll come to realize in time that her father's opinion isn't the one that matters. Still, her having an ally in the Hyuuga clan would be useful. Someone has to teach her the advanced techniques of her clan.
Too bad that her Byakugan doesn't seem to be that well developed compared to other members of her clan. I guess we won't be seeing her kick Neji's butt in this fic, unless she manages to surpass him in other areas or it turns out to be a misconception. But how high's the chance of that happening?
Quizer
Quizer posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 10:05pm
Great job! I love it!
I laughed out loud at the prank Naruto pulled on Kurenai. Possibly your funniest scene ever! Good job!
BTW, what did Naruto do to the Hokage monument in canon? (and in your story as well, since there was no indication anything had changed in that regard)
The Fire Lord, as mentioned during the cat retrieval missions, is just a fancy word for Hokage, isn't it? Just wanting to make sure.
I like how Kurenai seems to take her instructor duties seriously like (apparently) no other jonin. They'll all receive a nasty surprise during chuunin exams, eh? :D
A question: The Jyuuken style itself is not a kekkai genkai, is it? So theoretically, someone outside the Hyuuga clan could learn the techniques. The problem is the execution, and knowing where the tenketsu points are. Someone without a byakugan (or maybe sharingan) would probably never be able to execute the full techniques, but there are bound to be tenketsu that are more important/vital than others and everyone can push out chakra through their palms, right? I wonder, did anybody else ever think of this? I imagine all those sharingan users would be over it like a rash...
The water-walking thing also made me wonder about something: with his enormous chakra reserve/regeneration, shouldn't Naruto be able to float in the air a là DBZ-style, or at least use chakra to boost his jumps? I know that probably requires better chakra control than he has at the moment, but he can use sheer power to partially make up for it, by expelling chakra at a broader angle. The technique could also be used to change course in mid-air to avoid enemy attacks. Will we be seeing something like this?
Great job on the overall chapter. I can't find a single thing wrong with this and I hope you'll continue in this vein! :D
Quizer
William Fowler posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 5:29pm
Hey, just got into Naruto fanfiction, and believe it or not, when I saw that you wrote it, V, I was like... "no way!"
So I took a look, and was very inspired, then and there. I've seen the series, and you're right, there are so many areas that could be improved upon, had he not chosen Sakura, but Hinata. At least, even if it is just in friendship, at the moment.
Too bad I've not read enough to be considered, "experienced" enough to start writing some fanfiction in this genre, it would be very cool, I think.
Other than my ramblings, I just wanted to say, "good fic" and that I loved the NaruHina interaction.
Will
Brandon West posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 2:08pm
Very good. I've only seen a few Naruto episodes, but this story is fun regardless. Keep it up.
asher1978 posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 1:02pm
Another excellent part. Really liked the interaction among Shino, Naruto and Hinata. Keep up the great work and more soon please.
Lufio posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 6:55am
--,-'{@
Liking what you've done.
'Specially the chakra pulse.
Naruto's a nuke.
^_^
Long-range field recon
As the team's guiding vision,
Good theme for this fic.
Mayjest posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 6:24am
I'll be honest. I never expected to find myself reading Naruto Fanfiction, despite how much I enjoyed watching the first 100 episodes that I nicked from my mates hardrive. I will admit that I am reading this purely because I think incredibly highly of your HP fiction, Futures Past. That said, this is easily one of the best fanfics I have read. Your writing quality is easily within the top 10% of authors, and I find myself enjoying this very much so.
I am especially enjoying the parallels between this and the anime, the differnt perspectives of the characters is similar to the anime as well. It is also incredibly easy to visualise what's happening - with the exception of Naruto's new getup... He will always be in a horrible orange jumpsuit to me! In short, I am impressed.
I also compliment you on the 'shipping' side of the story. Subtle, yet strong. Subtle, in that your not shoving it in our faces, or making either Naruto or Hinata go out of character to get them started (as many authors seem prone to do), yet it is also obvious where it will end up eventually. Something which is also a boon, as I hate the stories which keep flitting around, setting characters up with several others before finaly getting to the one that the author said they would.
In short, I like it. But I would prefer a chapter of Nightmares of futures past soon!
Ladegard posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 3:29am
Very nice. The first time I read this through, I had issues with the seeming speed of changes but on further reflection realized that you had passed more time than I thought. I'm being especially impressed with the work you're doing with Shino, he's a frequently overlooked character.
- Tom
Adrian R Brown posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 2:10am
Absolutely wonderful! Incredibly written. All the characters written very believably. I can't wait to read more. I have to confess that I'm far more eager for updates to this story of yours than any other. Keep it up!
glorfy posted a comment on Wednesday 8th March 2006 12:13am
Whoo!
nice work on that chap.
Naruto proved he hasnt lost his prank making abililities, he impresses shino, and hinata gets suspisions about his red chakra.
and frankly, the chakra pulse was just cool.
was that the first time hinata went all out so far? that should help her confidence a bit, but time will tell if she manages to keep the feeling going...
love your work as always
glorfy
TomokiG posted a comment on Tuesday 7th March 2006 9:43pm
Wow... that was a heck of a chapter ^.^ You know you just advanced to one of the best authors I read stories from.
I hope you're continuing as good as you currently are.
Good work...
°TomokiG °
Sebastian Palm posted a comment on Tuesday 7th March 2006 9:15pm
What a lovely surprise to wake up to in the morning - a huge chunk of *good* Naruto "whiffery"... I've been following this fic since you published the first chapter on ff.net, and frankly I don't know any more which of your two fics I look forward to reading more - they're both "drop everything and read *now*"-level...
When I got done laughung at Naruto's Henge-prank, I felt like I'd been doing sit-ups the whole morning - haven't had a laugh quite that good in a while. Thanks for that.
SP
Quizer posted a comment on Friday 17th March 2006 1:48am