Team 8
By Viridian
I did pick up the Matrix quote, but I can't believe it took me this long to get to recognizing it. Perfect and nicely humourous
Great story! I always look forward to getting more of this one as much as I do getting more of /Nightmares of Futures Past/, which is saying something. *grin*
A comment on translation, however: You frequently refer, in this story, to "Tenketsu points." This is a redundancy in the same vein as "PIN number" -- /tenketsu/ ARE points, specifically the focal
points at which more chi than usual flows. This is usually translated to English -- inadequately, because the conceptual underpinnings aren't there -- as "pressure points" or "acupuncture
points."
In the context of the Narutoverse, it's probably chakra rather than chi, but the concept doesn't change. If, in your writings, you want to retain the Japanese word for flavour, it might be better to
drop the "point" part and just call them "tenketsu," or perhaps "tenketsu foci" to help retain some indication of the meaning for those who are not familiar with the idea.
I decided a while back that I would eschew truly foreign words as much as possible in my own stories, because in all likelihood, most of my readers only know English. If you want to go the
English-only route for "tenketsu," I suggest something like "vital points," or possibly "vital foci." Those are about as close as I can get to conveying the underlying concept, short of including a
rather unfocused and rambling author's note. (As you may have gathered from this review, brevity is not one of my virtues. *wry grin*)
Looking forward to "The Next Part!"
Did you see why I'm such a rabid Aburame Shino fan? Cold logic at work, people, cold logic.
Well this story has been highly recomended and I see that the praise is well deserved. Keep up the good work.
the matrix huh? that was great! "Adaptation, Improvisation. But your weaknesses are not your techniques."
Congratulations! I think you are the first person on this site or ff.net who picked up on that (without any other clues, anyway). Bravo!
woot, team 8 goodness.
love the quote from the matrix *G*
i cant wait to see one of narutos training sessions with gai.
although i think i fear it at the same time.
:)
love the bunshin thing, and his joke. or was he not joking? i think it was perhaps a bit of both
cheers for the quick update :)
-glorfy
fantastic story please update agin soon
I really like your story, the changes help me empathize with the characters better. You are quickly becoming one of my favorite authors.
Ja!
Very nice-a! I don't normally read Naruto fanfic, but this caught my interest quite quickly! Good job!
Hey there, I was reading this story over at fanfiction.net as well. Looking forward to seeing where you go with this.
very nice, I expected more loudmouth Naruto for at least a few chapters but this version of him is a lot more enjoyable, are you going to have a scene were Shino usess his bugs I've always thought they were damn cool...and a little freaky, wonder how Naruto is going to respnd to Kyuubi this time round?
Can't wait for more. Keep up the good work!